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Showing posts with the label happy

Going out with some good advice!

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      Well, I'm not happy yet - this final list had better sort me out, 43.  Wear glitter Apparently Ganni have launched biodegradable glitter, so all you Guardian types can breathe easy now.  Unless you have sparkalophobia, apparently.  Either way, I'm pretty certain that me wearing glitter would not cheer my children up. 44.  Ice, baby Follow an online tutorial and ice a cake.  That might cheer me up, but I suspect a spot on Bake Off - An Extra Slice would be a more likely result - the rubbish cakes are one of the few things I'm almost guaranteed to laugh at on telly. 45.  Make your own hair treatment You can just tell this is going to be so, so Guardian without reading the rest, can't you?  Apparently you need " mayonnaise, eggs (raw, not fried or scrambled), rosemary oil, olive oil and honey " and " Yes, it’s a little messy. Yes, you will smell like a salad dressing ".  I'm kinda sad they made it clear not to use fried eggs thou...

I ain't getting on no crane

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     Our penultimate attempt at being happy 32.  Get debobbling " Discover the disproportionate pleasure of restoring a bobbly cardigan, or rug, to its former pristine glory with the electric debobbler ".  I can imagine that it is pleasing, as opposed to full on cheering - but I struggle to imagine me ever buying an electric debobbler. 33.  Make personalised biscuits "Stamping rude, personalised messages on to biscuits is huge, childish fun" - who knew?  And what rude message do The Guardian suggest?  Yes, it's "You disgust me" - I struggle to imagine anyone I know using that particular insult.  I can, however, imagine quite a few people I know being inventively offensive with this task. 34.  Whittle while you work Spoon whittling is a thing, apparently.  Not for me it isn't. 35.  Wash your dirty trainers I can't see this would exactly cheer me - but if I owned white trainers then it might at least slightly lighten my mood....

Full of the joys of winter

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    We're half way to being happy! 21.  Learn a magic trick I like the idea, but if I did learn a good trick a) I'd bore everyone with it and b) I'd tell everyone how it worked.  At which point I'd have to learn a new trick.  So I won't even start. 22.  Talk to strangers in queues Younger me would never have done this.  But older me does it much more than my children would like.  And, one day, they'll do it much more than their children would like.  That's the order of things, my friend. 23.  Steam your clothes The thinking here is that ironing is no fun, so steam!  But here's a better idea - ironing is no fun, so don't! 24.  Try a new lipstick style Apparently, " a  two-tone lip (bright red on the top, pink on the bottom) is a punchy way to lift your countenance " - which is obviously a load of old bollocks, but I can imagine it might cheer you up.  It's not entirely applicable for me though. 25.  Welcome your i...

Happy, happy, joy, joy!

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   Are you not cheered up yet? 11.  Pick a new Christmas decoration I like the idea and my wife does this from time to time - despite the fact that we hardly have a square millimetre available on our tree.  I'm not entirely sure I quite go with The Guardian's option though  - anyone fancy a memento mori skull on their tree? 12.  Walk backwards How is this going to cheer you up?  Apparently you should start with ten steps and build up - I have absolutely no idea what this is supposed to achieve. 13.  Change things up "Walk to work a different way, switch to a more nutritious breakfast cereal, or get off the bus one stop early".  Allegedly, we repeat about 40% of our habits every day - I'm not entirely convinced by the number but I do agree we are creatures of habit and it never hurts to try to something new.  When I go into the office, I like to go out for a walk at lunch on a route I've not done before - when it's not raining, so I've no...

Bringing cheer into your life

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  It's cold.  It's wet.  It's dark.  I just wish there was some way to add cheer to my life.  Maybe something like writing up how ridiculous The Guardian's suggestions are on that very subject would hit the spot nicely... 1.  Start Christmas early Christmas is hard work in the Reed household - there are something like 15 heavy boxes that have to come down from upstairs.  But, there's no doubt that Christmas adds cheer to the place and starting it a couple of weeks early doesn't seem like the worst thing you could do.  But I can't say I feel the need right now. 2.  Have a fondue "Unfairly viewed as naff and dated, fondues are overdue a revival " says The Guardian.  "Just no " says me.  Surely the washing up is a nightmare as well? 3.  Go electric Go on - guess.  Apparently you should " d iscover the life-changing power of an electric blanket " - that doesn't sound very cost-of-living-crisis friendly to me.  What's wro...

Why is no-one taking pictures of my sock drawer?

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  What have  The Guardian  got for us today then?  51.  Find one practical way to make a difference This is sage advice about how starting one small thing often snowballs into something bigger - but I'm not sure it's guaranteed to make you happier.  Busier, yes - but happier?  Well... 52.  Posh up your toast Amazingly, The Guardian doesn't mention avocado - yes, their suggestions are far worse.  Olive oil, a rub of garlic and a few tomatoes anyone?  A chunky (and preferably not orange) marmalade does the trick for me - but each to their own, I guess. 53.  Literally count your blessings Yeah, it's telling you write them down and count them up.  Which I guess might work, provided you have some. 54.  If you wear glasses, attach a chain I'm intrigued by this one because I've worn glasses for coming up to 50 years now and at no point have I EVER felt the need for a chain.  And I imagine it would really annoy me - so why wo...

£100? ONE HUNDRED QUID?!?

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  What have  The Guardian  got for us today then?  41.  Watch monster wave videos on YouTube I was really, really, really, really hoping this would be videos of monsters waving.  It wasn't. 42.  Sign up to be a telephone befriender I'm not going to do it, but it does sound like a nice thing to do, so I'm going to include the link .  If you do it, I promise you it will make me happier. 43.  Don’t be greedy Hmmm - surely greedy people are happy being greedy, so would they be happier if they weren't greedy?  Either way, The Guardian advice columnist wrote the biggest load of bollocks on the matter such that I considered being greedier just to make her stop. 44.  Try false eyelashes A (very small) part of me is tempted to try this round the house to see if the wife or daughters notice - the weird looks they gave me before they realised would certainly make me happier, I can assure you. 45.  Get some proper matching pyjamas The firs...

This is a thing?

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  What have  The Guardian  got for us today then?  31.  Get some ‘peel and stick’ wallpaper This is a thing?  I remember when I had to coat my school books in sticky back plastic, I always ended up with a bump or two in there - how's that going to look on the walls?!? 32.  Switch to silicone-free shampoo This is a thing?  I'd ask why does shampoo have silicone in it, but I suspect I'd soon get bored with the answer.  The Guardian says that switching to it means you need to wash your hair less - to be honest washing my hair isn't a huge problem for me, so I'm guessing it wouldn't have a massive effect. 33.  Burn incense Anyone doing this anywhere near me is not going to experience any greater happiness.  See also - those stupid stick things you stand in oil, pot pourri, plug-in air fresheners. 34.  Try roller-skating or skateboarding "Wear kneepads" says The Guardian.  "Just don't" says me. 35.  Surprise someone with s...

A Kamado barbecue, you say?

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  What have  The Guardian  got for us today then?  21.  Head to the water They mean in or on, but I might consider close.  But probably not. 22.  Do something to celebrate the Queen’s platinum jubilee I'll take some days off work and chill out with my family - does that count?  I'm not entirely sure what I think about the Queen - I mean, she has been Queen for a long time, but it's not exactly been the hardest of lives, I suspect.  Yes, it's a lot of "work", but it's not really work, is it?   Oooh - controversial. 23.  Get a bath pillow I discussed this with Mrs Reed - she last had a bath about 4 years ago and before that, it was 12 years ago.  And I have certainly not had a bath in all that time - so a bath pillow is not going to make us any happier. 24.  Learn a new, achievable skill on YouTube Now, I think this probably is a good idea.  What I'm not so convinced about is the skills under discussion - cleaning ...