£100? ONE HUNDRED QUID?!?

 



What have The Guardian got for us today then? 

41. Watch monster wave videos on YouTube
I was really, really, really, really hoping this would be videos of monsters waving.  It wasn't.

42. Sign up to be a telephone befriender
I'm not going to do it, but it does sound like a nice thing to do, so I'm going to include the link.  If you do it, I promise you it will make me happier.

43. Don’t be greedy
Hmmm - surely greedy people are happy being greedy, so would they be happier if they weren't greedy?  Either way, The Guardian advice columnist wrote the biggest load of bollocks on the matter such that I considered being greedier just to make her stop.

44. Try false eyelashes
A (very small) part of me is tempted to try this round the house to see if the wife or daughters notice - the weird looks they gave me before they realised would certainly make me happier, I can assure you.

45. Get some proper matching pyjamas
The first sentence of this starts "Tekla's cost just over £100", so I imagine you're feeling happier already imagining my response to that.  Apparently they are "organic, wash well and are chic enough to wear to the shops".  They can also just fuck right off.

46. Go outside every day before 9am
I kinda agree with this, except that if you're happy in bed, then it's not going to make you happier to have to get up to go outside.  But, in the middle of summer, if you're awake at 5ish (or before), it's lovely to make a coffee, go outside and watch the sun come up (and yes, having a greenhouse really helps here).

47. Change the default typeface on your email
Apparently The Guardian went from sans serif to Georgia - I'm tempted to go Comic Sans just to annoy people.  But the best I can do here is Comic Neue - which is disappointingly unannoying.

48. Rent a few nice pieces of fashion
Yeah.  Right.

49. Buy a single share in something non-evil
Huh? Orsted, Emphase or SSE are suggested options, but given that SSE is a FTSE 100 company, I bet they're a bit evil really.  And what is one share supposed to achieve?

50. Make a playlist for a friend with different music tastes from yours
I think we can quite safely say I've got this one covered, but if anyone really feels they need more musical suggestions, then just shout.

This was not a good selection - waving monsters, false eyelashes and making playlists are the winners (and the first two only make it for comedy value).

#31-40 : Fesshole, Bluetooth speakers and minibreaks
#51-60 : Planting things, buying spices and Richard Rogers' socks

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